Parental responsibility and child issues are the most emotionally charged issues of all issues in dissolution of marriage case. The duties and responsibilities of a family attorney and family court judge are the greatest and most complex. When divorcing parents cede to the judicial branch of government the duty to decide the most intimate family issues, it is not unlikely that one or both parents will be less than satisfied with the decision. The bench and bar have for years now encouraged divorcing parents to resolve their differences through mediation. In effect, parents have urged to make their own law, in hope that they can better live with a decision that is their own, rather than a decision that is externally imposed. Where attempts at mediation or other settlement fail, or are not seriously undertaken, a court must decide. It is the family lawyer’s responsibility to mare sure that the parents proceed with their eyes open to reality and know the consequences of giving up their parental power to a stranger, a judge, to decide child issues in a limited amount of time with a limited amount of information.

It is a family lawyer’s primary responsibility to act as a counselor and advisor, only to provide the most competent representation in this emotionally charged area of family law, or refer the parental responsibility and child issues to an experienced family attorney who specializes in these issues. Because an appellate court will not reverse unless the trial court abuses its discretion, the parental responsibility determinations of the family court judge may be that one of the parents must live without potential recourse. Court is and should be last resort.

The family lawyer’s role in parental responsibility and child issues is to focus the parents in the best interest of the child at a time when they are focus in themselves and are struggling through the emotional dissolution of marriage process, direct the legal dissolution of marriage outside of the courtroom by referring families to resources that will make their relationships stronger to leave families in better condition than when they entered the legal system. Use of the legal systems should be necessary to promote and enforce compliance with interventions that address the family’s interrelated legal and non-legal problems to produce a result that improves the family functioning, empowers families through skills development, assists them to resolve their own disputes, provided access to appropriate services, and offers a variety of dispute resolution forums where the family can resolve problems without additional emotional trauma.

Therefore, instead of immediately going into litigation mode, unless there is an emergency the endangers the child, consider interventions prior to depositions and adversarial hearings. Delay litigation using the case management process first. The child will benefit from tow healthy parents. The family will benefit and leave the legal system better then they entered.

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